Price, 25 Cents 



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9. 



^ Bill Perkins' Proposin' Day 





PUBLISME,D BY 

ThIL DfLAMATIC PuBl^ISniNG COMPAMY 
CHA-RLES H SERGEL. , PRESIDENT 



t 






Practical Instructions for 
Private Theatricals 

By W. D. EMERSON 
Author of "A Country Romance," "The Unknown Rival" 
"Humble Pie," etc. ' 



Price, 25 cents 



Here is a practical hand-book, describing in detail all the 
accessories, properties, scenes and apparatus necessary for an 
amateur production. In addition to the descriptions in word^ 
everything is clearly shown in the numerous pictures, more 
than one hundred being inserted in the book. Ko such useful 
co'^untr ^^'^"^ ''^^'■^'^ ^"^ ^^"^ amateur players of any 

CONTENTS 

Chapter I. Introductory Remarks. 

Chapter 11. Stage, How to Make, etc. In drawing-rooms 
or parlors, with sliding or hinged doors. In a singlf Tar^e 
loom. The Curtain; how to attach it, and raise it, etc " 

Chapter III. Arrangement of Scenery. How to hang it. 
JJrapery, tormentors, wings, borders, drops. 

Chapter IV Box Scenes. Center door'pieces, plain wings, 
door wings, return pieces, etc. * ' 

Chapter V How to Light the Stage. Oil, gas and electric 
8?age, J;"*"^^t«' Sidelights, Reflectors. Ho'w^ to darken the 

Chapter VI Stage Effects. Wind, Rain, Thunder, Break- 
ing Glass Falling Buildings, Snow, Water, ' Waves, Cascades, 
Passing Trams, Lightning, Chimes, Sound of Horses' Hoof a) 

Chapter VII. Scene Painting. 
Chapter VIII. A Word to the Property Man. 
Chapter IX. To the Stage Manager. 
Chapter X. The Business Manager. 

Address Orders to 
THE DRAMATIC PUBLISHING COMPANY 

CHICAGO, ILLINOIS 



BILL PERKINS' PROPOSIN* 
DAY 

A Rustic Comedy in One Act 



By 
HELENA A. PFEIL 



Copyright, 1910, by The Dramatic Publishing Company 



CHICAGO 

THE DRAMATIC PUBLISHING COMPANY 



?5 43^ 
^1 l^^-l 



CAST OF CHAHACTERS. 

Bill Perkins, Eustic widower of fifty. 
Tom Tucker, Rustic beau of twenty-five. 
Mrs. Hawkins, Eustic widow of forty-five. 
Betty Hawkins, Eustic belle of twenty. 

Costumes, countrified. 

Scene, a farmhouse kitchen. 

Plays twenty minutes. 



TMPS6-006892 



'CID 22980 



BILL PERKINS' PROPOSIN' DAY. 

Scene. — When the curtain rises the stage is vacant; the 
room is an ordinary country Uvitig room; there must he 
a churn on stage. A rap is heard at the door, receiving 
no ansiver. Mr. Perkins enters, looks in rather sheeyishly 
at first, then comes in. 

' Bill Perkins. Law ! Where's all the folks ? The house 
seems clean desarted. Whall I'd heap rather find the 
coast clear, than ter find folks here that I didn'i keer 
about havin' round, as I meant this yer ter be my pro^ 
posin' day ter Miss Betty. Miss Betty, yer see, she's the 
one I've got sot on. I've done bought the weddin' dress. 
Now lolok here, I know scott clear that a fellow don't 
ginerly buy the lady's weddin' dress a tall, or, if he does, 
he waits till he's clar sure that the gal's goin' ter have 
him. Ha, ha, ha ! [He puts his hands in his trouser 
pockets and laughs heartily, his hat on the hack of his 
head.] But I jest reckoned this yer way, sez I, now if I 
go over thar and propose ter Miss Betty an' have that ar 
silk dress ter bring up, it'll be a sorter help like. Now, 
this yar dress cost me twenty-five dollars if it cost me a red 
cent. [He looks about.] I'd l^etter git out o' here, this 
ain't no way to be cotched on the day that you've sot for 
proposin' ter a young lady. [Listens.] Thar is somebody 
stirrin' 'round out yonder. I guess I'll take a sneak an' do 
the thing proper. [He walks out rapidly with his hands in 
pockets, coming down on his heels and toes heavily. Then 

S 



4 BILL PERKINS' PEOPOSIN' DAY 

Miss Betty Hawhins enters singing gayly and seats herself 
at the churn and sings at her ivorl\ A rap is heard, she 
ceases to sing and lools towards door.] 

Betty. Come in. [Enter Mr. Perkins, hat in his 
hand.] 

Per, Good day, Miss Betty. 

Betty. How do you do, Mr. Perkins. [Resumes 
churning.'] 

Per. Miss Betty, [He hesitates, twirling his hat around 
shyly.] I — I — [Scratches his head.] 

Betty. Have a seat, Mr. Perkins. [Curtly.] 

Per. Thank you, Miss. [Draivs chair nearer and sits 
doivn.] Miss Betty, I jest thought as t'was so powerful 
hot a workin' in the sun, I'd stop over an see you — you all 
a little bit. [Lays bundle on the floor.] It's been power- 
ful hot all day. [Wipes his face with a bright red hand- 
kerchief.] 

Betty. Well Ma's in the kitchen, if you want to see 
her I'll call her. [Churns again rapidly.] 

Per. Miss Betty I'd like yer ter stop that ar churnin'' 
fer a little while, as I want ter talk ter you. [Betty ceases 
churning for a moment and looks defiantly at Perkins.] 

Betty. Well ! 

Per. It's jest this yer, Miss Betty, I've been over to 
the village — [Clears his throat and hesitates.] 

Betty. Well I've nothing to do with your goin' to 
the village. 

Per. Well I mean ter say that I bought a beautiful 
silk dress, pure silk every thread of it, and — [Clearing his 
throat.] if you'll accept it, [Clears his throat.] I mean 
if you'll accept me, it's to be your weddin' dress. [Betty 
turns to her churn abruptly and churns away without 
answering a word. Perkins gets on his knees.] Miss 
Betty, is it to be yes or no? 



BILL PEEKINS' PEOPOSIN' DAY 5 

Betty. Tain't no use for you to go on like that, Bill 
PerkinS;, for I've done told you a dozen times that I ain't 
wantin' you ter come here at all. I ain't never had no 
notion of you, and I ain't a goin' to have you nor your 
silk dress, so there. [Rises and stamps her foot impa- 
tiently. Enter Mks. Hawkins, sleeves up.'] 

Mrs. H. Law sakes alive ! What's all this ahout ? Law, 
Mr. Perkins, this hour of the day and down on your 
knees. Ha, ha, ha ! [Perkins rises as she enters.] 

Per. It's beggin' your pardon. Mam, but I jest stepped 
over to see Miss Betty a bit, as it was too hot a workin' 
out doors. I jest sez. ter myself, I'll go over thar and 
tell Miss Betty about the silk dress I bought, but she ain't 
a wantin' ter hear no thin' about it, pears to me like. 

Mrs. H. [In surprise.'] Why Betty ! 

Betty. I don't want his silk dress, nor I don't want 
him. [RocJcs to and fro, twisting Iter apron corner.] 

Mrs. H. No, it's that ne'er do well Tom Tucker that 
you're wantin', and not a dollar in his pocket. That's just 
it, Mr. Perkins, j^ou needn't waste your time nor your 
breath a talkin' ter her. She's a head-strong girl, Betty 
is, and I feel sorry for the man that gits her, indeed I do. 

Pee. Whall I jest hoped that she'd consent, as I was 
sot on it, and I'd o' done the right thing by her. 

Betty. Maybe if you'd a done the right thing by Mrs. 
Perkins she might be a livin' today. 

Mrs. H. Law sakes alive, hush, did I ever think I'd 
live to see the day that I'd hear my own flesh and blood 
talkin' to anyone like tliat ! Betty, Betty. 

Per. Tain't no fault o' mine that Mrs. Perkins died. 
The Lord knows and I kin swar on a stack of Bibles knee 
high, that she had on as purty a silk dress the day her 
an' I. got married as you ever clapped yer two eyes on, 



e BILL PERKINS' PEOPOSIN ' DAY 

and 1 bouglit it with my own money, an' thafs the truth. 
[Betty laughs saucily. \ 

Betty. Well I'll bet she never had another silk dress 
after that'n wore out. Ila, ha, ha ! 

Mes. H. Betty daughter, that'll do now. Have you 
done forgotten that Mr. Perkins is past fifty and deservin' 
of respect. 

Betty. No, Mam, I ain't forgot it and what's likely I 
ain't a goin' ter forget so far as ter go an' marry him. I 
might as well marry my grandfather. Ha, ha, ha ! 

Mrs. H. AVel! please respect your elders then and stop 
talkin' saucy. 

Per. It's all riglit, Mi's. Hawkins, an' I hope she'll 
never regret the refusin' of me. 

Mrs. H. I hope she never will, Mr. Perkins, that's 
what I hope. The gals now o'days ain't like when you 
an' I was 3'oung. Law sakes alive, we jest took the first 
good chance that came along, and was glad to git it. But 
they ain't that way now days, that they ain't, they're in- 
dependent up to their teeth, and Betty's clean spoilt, 
that's M'hat she is. 

Per. You're plum right, Madam. Well, ladies, I wish 
. you both good day, and good luck ter you. Miss Betty. 
[He tal'i's his bundle under his arm, bows.] 

Mrs. H. Good day; come around again an' don't let 
Betty's talk an' actin' keep 3'ou away. 

Per. All right, thank you. Mam. [Exit Perkins.] 

Mrs. H. Betty, I'm down right ashamed of you, that 
I am, and it ain't every girl that gets a chance of a rich 
man like Mr. Perkins, it's the chance o' a life time. 

Betty. I don't care if I never get another chance. I 
ain't a goin' to marry Bill Perkins and that's all there is 
to it. He's old as Mathusalem. 



BILL PERKINS ' PEOPOSIN ' DAY 7 ' 

Mks. H. Whist, whist, he ain't a day over fifty and 
I'm near that myself. 

Betty. Supposin' you take him, mother. 

Mrs. H. Law sakes alive, what's the child thinkin' 
about ? Your father's bin dead five years, two months 
and twenty-seven days, exactly, and I ain't never low'ed 
a thought o' that kind to git inter my head, and it ain't 
becomin' in ycu, Betty, to mention that sort of a thing 
ter me. Mr. Perkins is all right, an' t'was down-right 
good in him to buy that silk dress a head o' time. 

Betty. AVhich shows that he's been countin' his 
chickens before they were hatched. Ha, ha, ha ! 

Mrs. H. Did he low' what sort o' shade o' silk it was ? 

Betty. Xo, Mam, an' I didn't ask him because I 
wasn't interested about it at all. 

Mrs. H. Perhaps it's pink or blue, or maybe it's 
changeable silk like Sarah Williams', but this ain't gettin' 
any churnin' done. I got a tub full o' things ter hang out. 
I wish, Bettv, yo'd run round the red barn presently an' 
look after the calf an' see if Speckle ain't layin' in the 
wood shed again. I seen her go in there this morning. 

Betty. All right, mother, I will presently just as soon 
as I give this churnin' another start. 

Mrs. H. Don't make it too long, daughter. [Exit 
Mrs. Haivl'ins. Betty pauses at the churn a moment, then 
takes a letter from her bosom or pocket and hisses it.] 

Betty. Dear, dear Tom, I wouldn't give him up for 
old Bill Perkins, nor all the silk dresses in the world. 
[Enter Tom unohserved.'} Bless his dear heart. No, indeed. 
I ain't goin' ter swap him for a silk dress, nor nothing 
else. Well, I guess I'd better go an' look after the calf 
an' Speckle. [She kisses the letter and appears to put it 
in her bosom, but drops it without perceiving it. Then 
goes out. Tom, a young farmer, handsome, but rustic 



8 BILL PEEKINS' PEOPOSIN' DAY 

in his manner and dress, appears not to notice the letter 
on the floor at first.^ 

Tom. Well now, if this yer ain't enough ter turn a 
fellow upside down, and inside out and give him the yaller 
janters to boot, ter come clear clean two miles ter see a 
young lady, and that same young lady yer sweetheart, and 
find her a kissin' somebody else's letter, and talkin' about 
a silk dress that somebody or nother is a wantin' ter 
give her. It's like my grandmother used to say. It's 
jest more'n flesh and blood kin bear. It jest makes a 
fellow feel like somebody was pourin' cold water down his 
back. I heard tell o' people being disappointed in love, 
but lands a musey, who'd a ever thought it o' Betty. 
[Walls about looking perplexed.] "There's many a slip 
twixt the cup and the lip," that's what my grandmother 
used ter say, and you are never sure of a thing till you've 
got it, an' then you had better not be too sure of it, be- 
cause it might slip away after you thought you had done 
cotched a hold of it. Jeminy crickets, what's this? [He 
picTcs up the letter.] Now here it is, the same letter that 
she was a readin' and a kissin' so confectionately when I 
came in. I'll see what this other fellow has got ter say. 
[He reads it.] "Darling Betty." [He whistles and 
scratches his head,] I'll have some squarin' up to do with 
that chap. [He reads on.] "I've been a dreamin' o' you 
every hour and every minute since we parted down under 
the old peach tree." Wahl he'll be a dreamin' o' me for 
a month or two, if ever I clap my hands on him, [He 
walTcs about distractedly.] That's the way it is, you put 
your confidence in a gal and it's just like pourin' water 
in a sifter, it'll all leak out again, that's exactly what my 
grandmother used ter say. [He folds the letter up and 
puts it in his pocTcet.] Wahl, I'll see about you later. 
[Enter Betty.] 



BILL PERKINS' PROPOSIN' DAY & 

Betty. Why how do you do, Tom. [Tom lool's sulky.'\ 
Why, Tom, what^s up? You look seven ways from Sun- 
day, or like a mud fence on a rainy day. What's up, I say ? 

Tom. Tain't nothin' up, it's all down an' I feel as if 
my heart's goin' clean down inter my boots. 

Betty. You're out o' sorts, Tom, is any of your kin 
folks dead? 

Tom. Wahl, I'll jest tell you, Betty, I found this yer 
letter on the floor here, and I came in jest when you was 
a readin' an' a kissin' it, an I heard every word you said 
about some other fellow, and it gave me the blues, as my 
grandmother used ter say when she got talkin' an' a 
thinkin' o' grandpap. 

Betty. Why it's my letter. How did I happen at all 
ter drop it, but I don't see why you should get upset about 
it, Tom. 

Tom. It's them courtin' words that's in it, an' the 
way you were goin' on alDout it, that's makes me feel poky, 
as my grandmother used ter say. 

Betty. Oh, hang your grandmother, Tom, you're a 
real goose. [She snatches the letter from him.'] It has 
the fellow's name right here at the bottom of the page. 
Ljok here— [.^//.e spells slowly] T-O-M, Tom Tucker. 
Don't you know your own letters when you see them ? 

Tom. W>11 bless my soul, Betty ! Well I'll be hanged ! 
Ha, ha, ha, that's the letter I wrote you when I went 
down to Buckskin ter get them new kind o' pumpkin seed. 
Well now, as my grandmother used ter say, you've got me 
Betty, and I'll own I'm dead beat. 

Betty. And something else will surely get you one of 
these days, if you don't open your eyes and look at things, 
before you fly all to pieces. Here, sit down on this chair, 
and promise me that you'll do better for the future. [Sits 
down.] 



10 BILL PEEKINS' PKOPOSIN' DAY 

Tom. I'll i^roniise you most anything now, Betty, but 
laws a mercy, I was a thinkin' about committin' susenside. 
[Betty is churning.^ Look here, Betty, can't you let that 
thing alone fur a little while. Tain't every day that I 
get an opportunity ter talk with you. 

Betty. Well I'm listening, Tom dear, head and ears. 
[Enter Bill Perlins with the same parcel.^ 

Per. Sorry ter disturb you folks, but I — I want ter see 
Mrs. Hawkins on perticular business. 

Betty. I'll go and tell mother that you want ter see 
her. [^st'c^c] I believe he's goin to propose to mother. 
[Exit Betty. Enter ivith Mrs. Hawkins.} 

Mrs. H. Sure as I'm alive if there ain't two gentle- 
men here, well this is company, and when it rains it pours. 

Tom. That's exactly what my grandmother used to 
say. How are you, Mrs. Hawkins? [Betty aside.] Tom, 
I wish you'd let up on your grandmother. [Threaten- 
ingly.'] If you don't — 

Tom. [Aside.] I will, I will. [Mrs. Hawkins pro- 
ceeds to dust a chair with her apron.] 

Mrs. H. Sit down, Mr. Perkins, and rest yourself. 

Per. [Clearing liis throat and hesitating.] I wanted 
ter see you. Mam, on some real perticular business. 

Mrs. H. Betty, daughter, run and shew the chickens 
out of the garden, that's a dear. 

Betty. All right, mother. [Beckons to Tom aside.] 
We're in the way I guess. 

Tom. [Follows her.] There is something up. [Ea:it 
both.] 

Per. Mrs. Hawkins, I'll come to the point at once. 
Yer see I had my heart sot on this yer bein' my proposin' 
day ter Miss Betty, an' after she rejected me I went over 
to home feelin' sort o' down in the mouth, so I jest got 
ter studyin' over the matter, and said to myself, now, 



BILL PEKKINS* PROPOSIN' DAY 11 

there's Miss Betty's mother, as fine a lady as could be 
found miles around. [Mrs. Hawkins bows veiij loiv.] 

Mrs. H. Thank you, Mr. Perkins. 

Pee. And I said ter myself, sez I, I'll just go over 
thar and carry this yer silk dress [Clears his throat.l and 
maybe she will .accept it, and me with it, for ter tell you the 
truth, Mrs. Hawkins, I get ratlier lonesome over thar 
to my place sometimes. It's a purty little home and it's 
yours for tlie taking of it. [Mrs. Hawl'ins feigns sur- 
prise and wipes her eyes with the corner of her api'on.'] 
Now, how is that, Mam? 

Mrs. H. You are a dear good man, never mindin' the 
home and silk dress. 

Per. But they go in with the bargain. 

Mrs. H. Law sakes o' live, now did I ever ! 

Per. Is it to be yes or no. Mam ? 

Mrs. H. Lands sakes o' lives, it's yes, Mr. Perkins. 
[Opens parcel.] 

Per. Wahl, this is a lucky day, and I ain't ter be dis- 
appointed after all. 

Mrs. H. What'll Betty say ? Law sakes alive. [Calls.] 
Betty! [Enter Betty and Tom holding hands.] Betty, 
daughter, look here; ain't this a stunnin' handsome dress, 
it's all silk, every thread of it, and it beats Sarah Wil- 
liams' all ter smash. 

Betty. There's nothing wrong about it, mother. 

Tom. It's exactly like the bed quilts that my grand- 
mother used ter make. [Betty shakes her head reprov- 
ingly, saying, Tom I Tom'] 

Mrs. H. Xow look here, Tom Tucker, don't you be 
making light of my weddin' dress. 

Tom. Well now that's a horse of another color. 

Betty. I thought there was something up. 

Tom. Well you are not the only blossom on the tree. 



12 BILL PERKINS' PEOPOSIN' DAY 

Betty and I'se ter get married, too. 

Per. Well all's well that ends well. 

Tom. That's what my grandmother used to say. 

Per. This here's heen a proposin' day sure enough. 
Supposin' we have a double wcddin'? 

To:m axd Betty. Good— good. 

Per. Then there will have to be two silk dresses, and 
I'm the man tliat's goin' ter foot the bill. How's that? 

Betty. Bill Perkins you are a trump. [Shal-es his 
hand.^i 

Per. That's worth a dozen silk dresses, and look here, 
little gal, I'm gointer be your stepfather now and you've 
got to walk the chalk line. 

Tom. That's what my grandmother used ter say. 

CUETAIN. 



Unde Rube 

An Original Homestead Play in Fotit Acts 

By CHARLES TOWNSEND 

The Finest Rural Drama Ever Published 



Price, 25 cents 



CHARACTERS 

RUBEN RODNEY (Uncle Rube), Justice of the Peace, School 

Trustee, and a master hand at "swappin' bosses". .. .Character lead 

SIMON SMARLEY. a smooth and cunning old villain ., 

Character heavy 

MARK, his son, a promising young rascal Straight heavy 

GORDON GRAY, a popular young artist Juvenile lead 

UPSON ASTERBILT, an up-to-date New Y'ork dude 

Character comedy 

IKE, the hired man. "I want ter know:" Eccentric 

BUB GREEN, a comical young rustic Low comedy 

BILL TAPPAN. a country constable Comedy 

MILLICENT LEE. "the prettv school teacher" Juvenile lady 

MRS. MARTHA BUNN, a charming widow Character comedy 

TAGGS, a waif from New York Soubrette 

Time — Mid Autumn. Place — Vermont. 

Time of playing — Two hours and a quarter. 

SYNOPSIS 
ACT I. The Old Homestead. Uncle Rube arrives. 
ACT II. The Constable's office. The plot to ruin Uncle Rube. 
ACT III. Evening at the old farm. Uncle Rube is arrested. 
ACT IV. The Constable's office again. The old farmer wins! 

This play was written by one of the most popular of American 
dramatists, whcsf works have sold by the hundreds of thousands. 
One of the best i)lays of its class ever written. Splendid characters. 
Powerful climaxes. Bright wit. Merry humor. Very easy to pro- 
duce. Requires only three scenes. No shifts of scenery during anj 
act. Costumes all modern. No difficult properties required. 

THE AUTHOR'S OPINION* 

MR. TOWNSEND says of this drama: "I consider that 'Uncle 
Rube' is far superior to any play depicting country life that I have 
yet written." 



This is the play for everybody — amateurs as well as professionals. 
It can be produced on any stage, and pleases all classes, from the 
most critical city audiences to those of the smallest country towns. 
Printed directly from the author's acting copy, with all the or'^inal 
Stage directions. 

Address Orders to 
THE DRAMATIC PUBLISHING COMPANY 

CHICAGO, ILLINOIS 



The Outcast's Daughter t fZTa^ 

By MARION EDDY PRICE, 25 CENTS 

Ten male, five female and one child characters. Plays two and 
one-half hours. Modern costumes. Three interior, one exterior 
scenes, all easily arranged where there is any scenery at hand. No 
stronger melodrama has been given the play-lcving public. Full of 
the strongest appealing heart interest, intense, pathetic, real life, 
where joy and laughter are mingled witli pathos and suffering, but 
all ending happily. A melodrama without a villain or the use of 
firearms. Amateurs may play it successfully, it plays itself, and 
it is adapted to strong repertoire companies. 

CAST OF CHARAGTERf:. 

Carl Faber An ex-convict 

Howard Ross A manufacturer 

Dennis Hogan Servant to Ross 

Abel Gardener to Ross 

Judge Havens , Of the police court 

Recorder Of tho police court 

Lettner Clerk of police court 

Second Court Clerk Clerk of police court 

Two policemen 

Little Hugo Agatha's child 

Agatha Steme Ross' bookkeeper 

Ida Rheinhold A retired singer 

Mrs. Wilmuth A washerwoman 

Katie Factory girl 

Frances Factory girl 

SYNOPSIS OF SCEI^S 

Act 1. Ross' private office. "What has given me' the honor of 
this visit?" "I will never sing again. My life has been a sad 
failure." "Good God! My mother!" "I have done v/rong, I confess, 
but when a mother asks, a child must forgive. Oh, Mr. Ross, help 
me." "You. my rich and famous mother, to you I was nothing, 
and you — you are nothing — nothing to me." "Agatha! Agatha! 
My child! My child!" 

Act 2. Agatha's attic. "My poor father. So young and strong. 
How I could have loved him." "Yes, Katie is right, I have nothing 
but bread for my sweet child." "Madam, I vould lie if I say sjie 
\as anything but a lady." "On the other side, towards the garden, 
there are a few rooms I have never used. If you will take 
them " "You do not look like a man who could commit mur- 
der. How was it?" "I was a weak man and many misfortunes 
made me desperate." "My picture! I must be mad." "You are 
good, child, but you shall not call me father." "Father! Father!" 

Act 3. Ross' Garden. "He is so good to me, but I cannot forget 
my poor unhappy father." "The picture was taken when I was 
young. He shall have it." "Stay hero and be my wife." "That 
suspicious old man is in the garden." "For her I sacrificed every- 
thing." "Do you want to go to prison again?" "My father needs 
me to defend and comfort him." 

Act 4. A Police Court. "Do not ask me, your honor — I am an 
<^x-convict." "Your silence will not help you." "It vas dark und 
Mrs. Steme vas that scared she vas faint." "I hope, sor, yer honor 
believes in a future life, sor." "He wished to see his chiW ; I am 
ills child." "Grandfather, we love you." "I am his wife. Do not 
condenm him." 

Address Orders to 

THE DRAMATIC PUBLISHING COMPANY 
CHICAGO. DTJNOW 



Dumont^s 
Minstrel Joke Book 



Price, 25 cents 



A Collection of Jokes arranged for End-Men, both professional and 
amateur. Never before collected and published in a clear manner 
and with bright dialogue for End-Men and Interlocutor. They 
form a book of the newest, most humorous and quaintest matter 
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to any assemblages before whom he may appear. 

Mr. Dumont himself says: "This collection of jokes and dia- 
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'sure laugh' producers are incorporated in this book." 



PARTIAL CONTENTS 

Arithmetic of Love, "Ask a Policeman," All about Novels, At Nia- 

§ara Falls, "A. P. A." and Bricks, Advantages of Education, All 
orts. Army and its Soldiers, Bad Case oi Lying, Base Ball. Breach 
of Promise, Burglars, Boston's Correct Language, Bravery in Battle, 
Fishing, Funny Signs and Borrowed Pants, Fish makes Brains, 
Firing off the Cannon, Climatic Changes, Clancy as a Diver, 
"Couldn't find a Policeman," Colonel Pepper, "Curiosities for Mu- 
seums," Conundrums, Cruelty to Animals, Country and Don't Drink, 
Couldn't take the Job, Comic Recitations, Cork Leg, "Casablanca," 
"Dreams," Ducks and Indians, Dutchman's Bet, "Daniel," Eating 
Dumplings, Epitaphs, Editing a Newspaper, Eating by Weight, Ed- 
ucated Horse, The Mule Battery, "Making Both Ends Meet," The 
Mind Reader, Missed the Hearse, Mixed Breed of Chickens, Married 
into a mean Family, Making a Pair of Shoes, Man's Ribs and Angel 
Cake, The New Poet, Never Happened, On the Battlefield, Off to the 
Seat of War, Our Brothers, Old Cider Barrel, Origin of Songs, 
Opinion on Man and Woman, Gratitude, Hotel Regulations, Hold 
your Head Up, How is Business. How Different Girls Kiss, Hash 
for the Navy, "Has not Caught Me Yet," Irish Monologue, It Runs 
in the Family, "If a River were between all Men and Women," 
Jumping Frog, Kissing, Kiss Sociable. Keep off the Grass, Kissing 
in the Tunnel, Lawyer and Doctor, Lost Umbrella, Liquor Assists 
Nature, Learning the Bike, Love and Matrimony, Law in Alaska, 
Shoemaker's Daughter, Singing at the Party, Storm at Sea, Spot- 
ted Dog, Swallowed an Egg, Second Time on Earth. Signs, Sorry 
he didn't Take it Cold. Progress. Parson's Sermon on Crap Shoot- 
ing, Poultry and Fruit, Power of Language, Perhaps I Will and 
Perhaps I Won't, Peculiarities of Speech, Pumpkin Pie, Patriotic 
Alphabet, Queer Advertisements. Ragged Jacket, Raising Grass- 
hoppers, Taught His Wife a Lesson, Thought it was a Boat-race, 
The Telephone, Thief with a Roman Nose. Taxes on Luxuries, 
Transfusion of Blood, Took the Dead Mans' Dollar. Two Good Liars, 
Three Realistic Dreams, Takes It just the same, "Twinkle, Twinkle 
Little Star," Very Good Tip, Very Large Punch Bowl, Very Mean 
Father, "We are Letters," "Went Home for his Pipe," "Why is a 
Ship called "She?" "What is Love?" "We are all Bottles," "Wish 
the Gun had gone off," Writing a Novel. 

Address Orders to 

THE DRAMATIC PUBLISHING COMPANY 

OaCA<*0. ILLINOIS 



HickVy Farm 

A G>medy Drama of New England Life 
in Two Acts 



By EDWIN M. STERN 



Price, 25 cents 



Six male, two female characters. The play deals with the same 
phases of life as "The Old Homestead" and "The County Fair," 
and is written in the same comedy vein which has rendered these 
two pieces so popular. The courtship of the Irish alderman is one 
of the most ludicrous scenes ever written, while the scenes between 
the old farmer and his daughter are most touching and pathetic. 
Scenery, a set cottage and a plain room. Costumes of the day. 
Time of playing, an hour and a half. 



SYNOPSIS OF INCIDENTS 
ACT I — Hick'ry Farm House 

Darkwood's Plot — Skinner tempted — Money! Gold! — Zekiel ap- 
pears — "Be you Ann Maria's boy?" — Fortune's reminiscences — The 
deed must be stolen! — Hard cider — Aunt Priscilla's love — The alder- 
man's brogue — "Dear departed Hezekiah" — Jessie's secret — "Then 
you still love me?" — "Larry McKeegan's courtin' " — The "widdy" 
succumbs — "Zekiel's fav'rit' song" — McKeegan's ghost — Jack Nel- 
son makes a discovery — Jessie has gone! — "Heaven help me!"— 
Zekiel's prayer. 

ACT II — In Fortune's Shanry 

Zekiel's misfortunes — The rent collector — Darkwood's insult — 
"Villain, you lie!" — Skinner's remorse — ^The New York detective^ 
The bank robbery — Darkwood threatens — Jessie returns — The alder' 
man married — "Sure it's a darlint little woife slie is" — Zekiel's hap- 
piness — "Gosh! I ain't felt so gol-darned happy sinct I wuz a boy" 
— A trap for Darkwood— Jack and Jessie reunited — Priscilla paci- 
fied — Darkwood at bay — "Stand aside, as you value your lives!"—. 
"The detective fires — "You've done for me this time!" — Zekiel's for- 
^ivaiess — Old Hick'ry farm restored. 

Address Orders to 
THE DRAMATIC PUBLISHING COMPANY 

, CHICAGO, ILLINOIS 



-^7 / ^^ 



One copy del. to Cat. Div. 



w 



Hageman^s Make-Up Book 

By MAURICE HAGEMAN 

Ptice, 25 cents 

The importance of an effective make-up is becoming more appar- 
ent to tlie professional actor every year, but liitherto there has been 
no book on the subject describing the modern methods and at the 
same time covering all branches of the art. This want has now 
been filled. Mr. Hageman has had an experience of twenty years 
as actor and stage-manager, and his well-known literary ability has 
enabled him to put the knowledge so gained into shape to be of 
use to others. The book is an encyclopedia of the art of making up. 
Every branch of the subject is exhaustively treated, and few ques- 
tions can be asked by professional or amateur that cannot be an- 
swered hj" this admirable hand-book. It is not only the best make- 
up book ever published, but it is not likely to be superseded by 
any other. It is absolutely indispensable to every ambitious actor. 

CONTENTS 

Chapter I. General Remarks. 

Chapter II. Grease-Paints, their origin, components and use. 

Chapter III. The Make-up Box. Grease-Paints, Mirrors, Face 
Powder and Puff. Exora Cream, Rouge. Liquid Color, Grenadine, 
Blue for the Eyelids, Brilliantine for the Hair. Nose Putty, Wig 
Paste, Mascaro. Crape Hair, Spirit Gum, Scissors, Artists' Stomps, 
Cold Cream, Cocoa Butter, Recipes for Cold Cream. 

Chapter IV. Preliminaries before Making up; the Straight Make- 
up and how to remove it. 

Chapter V. Remarks to Ladies. Liquid Creams, Rouge, Lips, 
Eyebrows, Eyelashes, Character Roles, Jewelry, Removing Make-up. 

Chapter VI. Juveniles. Straight Juvenile Make-up, Society 
Men. Young Men in 111 Health, with Red Wigs, Rococo Make-up, 
Hands, Wrists, Cheeks, etc. 

Chapter VII. Adults, Middle Aged and Old Men. Ordinary Type 
of Manhood, Lining Colors, Wrinkles, Rouge, Sickly and Healthy 
Old Age, Ruddy Complexions. 

Chapter VIII. Comedy and Character Make-ups. Comedy Ef- 
fects, Wigs. Beards. Eyebrows, Noses, Lips, Pallor of Death. 

Chapter IX. The Human Features. The Mouth and Lips, the 
Eyes and Eyelids, the Nose, the Chin, the Ear, the Teeth. 

Chapter X. . Other Exposed Parts of the Human Anatomy. 

Chapter XI. Wigs, Beards, Moustaches, and Eyebrows. Choosing 
a Wig, Powdering the Hair, Dimensions for Wigs, Wig Bands, Bald 
Wigs. Ladies' Wigs, Beards on Wire, on Gauze, Crape Hair, Wool, 
Beards for Tramps, Moustaches, Eyebrows. 

Chapter XII. Distinctive and Traditional Characteristics. North 
American Indians, New England Farmers, Hoosiers, Southerners, 
Politicians, Cowboj's, Minors, Qu.akers, Tramps, Creoles, Mulattoes, 
Quadroons, Octoroons, Negroes, Soldiers during War, Soldiers dur- 
ing Peace, Scouts, Pathfinders, Puritans, Early Dutch Settlers, 
Englishmen, Scotchmen, Irishmen, Frenchmen, Italians, Spaniards, 
Portuguese, South Americans, Scandinavians, Germans, Hollanders. 
Hungarians. Gipsies, Russians, Turks, Arabs, Moors, CafHrs, Abys 
sinians, Hindoos, Malays, Chinese, Japanese, Clowns and Statuary, 
Hebrews, Drunkards, Lunatics, Idiots, Misers, Rogues, 

Address Orders to 
PHE DRAMATIC PUBLISHING COMPANY 

CHICAGO. ILLINOIS 



JAN 3 I9II 

LIBRPRY OF CONGRESS 



PLAY 




And Entertainment Books. 

|0EI^G^ the largest theatrical booksellers in 
^ the United States, we keep in stock the most 
complete and best assorted lines of plays and en- 
tertainment books to be found anywhere. 

We can supply any play or book pub- 
lished. We have issued a catalogue of the best 
plays and entertainment books pubhshed in 
America and England. It contains a full 
description of each play, giving number of char- 
acters, time of playing, scenery, costumes, etc. 
This catalogue will be sent fi-ee on apphcation. 

The plays described are suitable for ama- 
teurs and professionals, and nearly all of them 
may be played free of royalty. Persons inter- 
ested in dramatic books should examine our cat- 
alogue before ordering elsewhere. 

We also carry a full line of grease paints, 
face powders, hair goods, and other ''make-up" 
materials. 

The Dramatic Publishing Company 
CHICAGO 



015 910 068 6 



